If you're going to eat cheese, take it out on a picnic, cut it up carefully, and really taste it -- with wine or something. ...Don't eat cheese. There are a million things to eat that are not cheese."
---Courtney Love, early 1990s, in Rollerderby

Legions (or, perhaps, dozens) of B&W readers will be relieved to know that this is one of the few times I ever agreed with Courtney Love on something. (And there's been a huge rift between us ever since, believe me.) In that spirit, here is an open letter to local restaurants, particularly the upscale grocery store/cafe near Navy Pier that was mysteriously "unable" to make a panini without cheese last night:

Folks, I appreciate economies of scale as much as the next person, but if you are running a restaurant, for the love of God try to offer things that people want to eat! I just don't do cheese. Understand? Try to see your way clear to offering a sandwich without cheese. Or at least be flexible to make a sandwich that usually comes WITH cheese, WITHOUT. Do not look stunned when I ask if a sandwich can come without cheese. Do not assume I can "just scrape it off" because if it's come to that point, it's already too late and I'm wishing I had gone to Subway. Put bluntly, cheese is a deal-breaker, folks! I am putting my foot down on this one.

Thanks. And have a great weekend!